Down Low: Fall/ Winter 2012

When you mention winter clothes, most people think boots, pants, and heavy coats.  Even in warmer climates, it's boots and coats.  Fashion designers this years have apparently decided that your legs don't get cold.  There are still boots out, and pants, but it appears that the ladylike silhouette of Mad Men and the rockabilly trend have taken over winter.
Ladies who love clothing with an actual waist, as opposed the shapeless sacks we've been seeing, you're in luck.  Belts, dresses with waists, pencil skirts, peplums... it all centers around showing off the feminine waist. 
Belts, as you've seen, are one of my favorite accessories.  Use a leather one, a cloth one, tie on a scarf as one, and BAM, a less than shapely outfit fit right and looks good. Proud of your waistline? Buckle a belt around it.  Don't care for your waist, but love your bust? Put a belt just under the bust.  Pants keep falling down?  put on a belt and tuck your shirt in to show off the belt.  Verdict: Unless you truly don't like your torso, or have other issues with belts, get a few.  While skinny belts are technically the hot thing, any belt (excluding the overly wide corset belt) is your friend.  This "trend" has never really wavered, even in the era of the potato sack.  I'd say stick with the classics and subdued version of the hot new trend, or you run the risk of looking like a teenybopper.
I also love a dress with a waist.  It looks good on damn near everyone, from the skinny toothpick to the heavily overweight.  Even if it's only the dress that has a waist, that create the illusion of the wearer having more of a waist.  A potato sack dress does very few people any favors.  Verdict: Enjoy this trend.  It is one of the very few in recent years that is nearly universally flattering.  Stick with the waist height that looks best on you (empire, natural waist, dropped waist) and you're in like Flynn.  I also believe this one may stick around a while, as a backlash against the shapeless dresses of the past several years.
Pencil skirts, straight skirts, wiggles skirts: whatever your preferred variety is, these are very "in" right now.  These cause the same waist effect that a good dress with a waist does.  Verdict: There's a reason these are considered classics.  Get at least one (preferably as a suit.)  Don't go too high in the leg (it turns into a skanky ho mini) or too long (sister wife or 1980s reject.)  Ideally, you want it to land within a couple inches either direction of the knee.  Also beware of frou frou detailing or detailing that would instantly date it.  You want a classic look.
Peplums are also back in. These also fall into the waisted category, and can be very figure flattering on many figures.  This is a very ladylike silhouette.  Verdict: This one comes down to personal taste.  It is a VERY feminine cut, so if you generally dress more tomboyish or avoid the romantic looks, I'd give this one a miss.  If you do go for it, the trend should be around for at least a year.  Just beware the overexaggerated peplum and the one in a very stiff material, as both of these can cast you toward fashion victim territory and make your hips appear ginormous.
For those of you that mostly wear pants, you're almost SOL.  There are a few trends I was able to dig up, but they seem to have taken a backseat to the skirt and dress this winter.  From what I've seen, the skinny/ cigarette pant trend has no intention of slowing down or going away.  This winter, it's colorful skinny jeans, cigarette/ stovepipe pants in nearly any color of the rainbow, and patterned pants.  (Translation: if you live in boot cut or wide leg pants, like I do, you're screwed.)
If you loved the skinny jean sensation this past year, you're in luck. Now they come in more colors and a couple variations of skinny.  You can even get them in patterns!  Verdict: This one's a matter of personal taste.  If you like skinnies, enjoy this trend, it shows no signs of going anywhere.  Stay away from the overly trendy colors (neon green leopard print is a bad idea) and don't get the leggings style to wear as pants. LEGGINGS ARE NOT PANTS.
Cigarette pants and stovepipe pants are back in season, too.  Unfortunately, it appears that the fashion gods have decree that this shall exist only in slacks, not jeans, for whatever reason.  Remember, this is the season of Audrey Hepburn and Mad Men, so of course we aren't entertaining your silly warmth ideas. Verdict: A cigarette or stovepipe pant can look good on nearly any figure, depending on the top it is paired with.  Beware that these are both meant to be ankle pants, so bunching around the ankles isn't good. 
If you like colorful, patterned pants, this is your season!  Brocade, prints, and true colors are all big things. Verdict: If you decide to partake in this trend, be very careful.  The colorful pants thing shows no signs of slowing down, but it can turn into a very dated look in the near future.  I'd avoid the wild patterns and brocade on the pants.  This one is nearly impossible to do right; you either look like a fashion victim, like a 60 year old woman at the opera, or like an '80s reject.

How's It Feel: Winter/ Fall 2012

One of my joys in winter is the feel of soft, cozy, furry, and leather clothes I can't wear when it's hot out. Sure, I COULD wear that cashmere sweater to work in July, when it's 105*F before heat index, but I like a life without heat stroke.  Winter fabrics just feel more fluffy bunny friendly.  It appears fashion designers have heard my plea for a winter of things that are interesting to touch.
Shiny is having a major moment this winter.  Patent leather, rubber, and metallics are all being touted as THE way to spice up your wardrobe. If you're in the market for patent leather shoes or a polyurethane coat, now's this time shop. Verdict:  In small doses, this trend is fine.  Anything more will mark you very quickly as a fashion victim.
Denim and chambray are also making a major comeback.  To truly do this trend justice, several designers are calling for a Texas tuxedo (matching jeans and jean jacket) worn with a chambray or denim shirt and denim cowboy boots.  I see that all the time here, and these people don't even know it's trendy.  Verdict:  One piece at a time, people.  I have a soft spot in my heart for the Texas Tuxedo, and I have been known to wear it, but at least make sure the pants and jacket are different shades of blue.  Leave the denim shoes on the shelf, those have all the hallmarks of bad taste, generally.  Chambray, worn with something other than jeans, can look very nice, but beware this'll probably be a one season thing.
Fur, leather, suede, and shearling are big, too, this year.  Then again, fur and shearling have been big for the past several winters and leather and suede new went out of fashion.  They're comfy, cozy, warm, and generally very winter friendly.  There's also faux versions of all of these, for those that can't afford the real thing. Verdict: For fur and shearling, I'd say stick with trims, linings and touches.  Otherwise you run the risk of looking like a yeti or an old society dame.  With either fur or shearling, it's really not worth it to pay for the real deal.  A leather coat or jacket is a great investment piece.  Buy it in a classic cut and wear it for years to come.  Get the real thing or an extremely high quality rip off, though.  Cheap pleather is not your friend.  Suede is hit or miss.  Stick with the natural colors; bright blue suede just looks cheesy.   I'd almost recommend a good fake over the real deal for suede, simply because it's not as delicate and doesn't throw a temper tantrum if you get it wet.
In the same vein, fluffy fabrics are back in.  Giant cozy sweater, fuzzy tunics, alpaca scarves, and fleecy goodness. Verdict:  Go form fitting in these, if you get the fluffy bunny fabrics, or risk looking like your clothes are trying to eat you alive.  Or you raided gramma's closet in a bad way.  Either way, no bueno.

Raining Gratitude

1) Army green short brimmed hat, gift
2) Tree of life/ snowflake pendant, $1, Claire's
3)  "Stand Back, I'm Going to Try Science" tee (under button up), gift
4) Black button up, $20, New York and Company
5) Jeans, $20, Old Navy
6) Knee high waterproof boots, $15, ?
 It's raining in the desert.  Not sprinkling.  It's coming down in sheets.  Hence why I'm wearing my equivalent of rainboots.  Why am I not wearing real rain boots?  Because I live in the scrub desert and can't justify a pair of shoes that sees real use once a year if I'm lucky. Same goes for why I'm not wearing a raincoat.  I have a hat, I have an umbrella.  Double duty, double use.
By the way, y'all, I just hit 1000 views.  While that doesn't seem like much, to me it means the world.  Thank you, Cheapasses, for making this dream become a reality!

Up Top: Fall/ Winter 2012

For winter, there are two camps in the fashion world.  There are the OMIGODILOVEIT types, for those who adore tights, boots, covering up, and layers.  Then there are the BRINGSUMMERBACK types, who live in sandals and tanks and only begrudgingly put on winter clothes to save themselves from frostbite.  Personally, I'm a winter person, even though I HATE the cold with a passion. The ability to wear more than a layer of thin cotton without sweating like a latex fetishist charms me.
There are multiple hot ticket items out for this winter.  I'll try to split them into categories, but some'll sit in multiple categories.
Call Attention To The Neck
Bow neck blouses.  Collars. Detachable collars. Huge scarves. Pendants.  These are all big right now.  If you want something to hang around your neck to show it off or cover it up, you're in luck.
Bow neck blouses seem to be a spin off of the retro/ rockabilly/ Mad Men fad goin on right now.  They tend to come back into style fairly often, especially when it gets cool enough that something at your neck doesn't smother you.  This style tends to look better in silk or an equally flowy material.  A bow at the neck in a stiff cotton makes you look like someone's pampered Persian cat.  Verdict:  If you like the feel of silky material and bows, I'd say go for it.  In the right material and cut, this style is relatively seasonless and would look good on nearly anybody, depending on where the neckline hits.  This is also a relatively timeless fashion unlikely to look dated in the near future, if you get a simple version.  I recommend a style akin to one of these: here or here.
Collars always come back around this time of year, to help protect against wind and cold. Turtlenecks and peter pan/ straight seam collars seem to be having a moment in the sun right now, with every conceivable variation of either one available, from extremely ornate or fur lined to simplistic school uniform collars.  Dickies are are enjoying a resurgence, both the turtleneck and collar versions.  If you do decide to get in on the ornate collar trend, I would suggest leaving the front open or otherwise leaving at least partial view of the neck, otherwise it could get a bit stuffy looking. Verdict: Beware that collared and high necked shirts do not look equally good on all people.  A large bust looks overwhelming with a high neckline, and drawing attention to the neck can draw attention to issues some people have with skin there.  If you can pull of a collar, stick with subdued detailing and leave the metal tips, wild patterns, and heavily ornate collars to those who can afford to indulge in a 3 week trend.  If you opt for the detachable collar (almost a necklace, really), be careful choosing it. A ringmail or pearl collar may look awesome now, but will look very dated very soon.
Collar necklaces are the mutant offspring between the detachable collar and a choker. They come in almost as many metals and materials as there are stars in the sky, as well as any price point, from Claire's to Bergdorf Goodman. Verdict: I'd say shy away from them, these are likely to be a flash in the pan trend.
Scarves come back every year, presumably for those folks where it gets cold enough for a scarf for something other than fashion.  This year, designers are pushing scarves that would double as a bed sheet or a sarong. Big and fluffy or chunky seem to be the MO this year.  As y'all've seen, I own 5 million and one scarves. I love scarves.  It's an easy way to dress up an outfit, an adjustable belt, and any other fashion accessory you might need in one length on fabric.  Verdict: Scarves never go out of fashion. Ever.  Indulge all you want in this trend, with one caveat:  if it doubles as a waterbed sheet, it's too big.
Pendants: personally, I'm ecstatic these are coming back in fashion.  I love a pendant necklace, mostly because they offer a focal point and keep themselves in place.  Verdict: Go for it.  At the right length and scale, any woman can wear a pendant necklace, even those not so proud of their neck.

Go Big
This appears to be the year of raiding other people's closets.  Boyfriend clothing, gramma's closet, and Dad's plaid are all equally enamored.
Want to instantly expand your wardrobe, look OMGFASHYUN, and turn on your local male (husband, boyfriend, guy friend, etc)?  Steal his clothes.  Wear his blazer with the sleeves rolled up, wear his button ups untucked over straight leg jeans, and steal his sweaters. Verdict: The slightly oversized look is really big.  It's also really comfortable and the boyfriend trend doesn't appear to be going anywhere soon.
Remember how gramma always wore oversized sweaters, coats, tweed and you pitied her but secretly wished you could get away with oversized?  This year, you can.  Buy that sweater a size or 2 too big and look suddenly fashionable.  Remember that too big coat hiding in the closet? Have fun.  Verdict: There's a fine line between fashionable and bag lady/ gramma.  Be careful.  Stick with only one oversized item per outfit, and if you think it looks sloppy, it probably is.  A belt would probably go a long way to making it better, though.  This idea is great for those growing or shrinking, especially teenagers or those losing weight.
Who can forget Dad's hideous golf pants or lumberjack shirts?  Steal that idea.  Plaid is in and it's everywhere.  Then again, it comes back in every winter.  This winter, it looks like they want you to steal Dad's lumberjack shirt, belt it, and wear it as a dress or tunic.  Verdict:  This one comes down to personal taste.  Don't let it overwhelm you and stay away from day-glo.
Puffer coats are back, and I don't mean short ones.  This season, puffer coats are knee length or longer, and belted for that fresh squeezed Pillsbury doughboy effect. Verdict: If you truly need a puffer coat for warmth this might be an ok idea, but a more streamlined coat looks better on pretty much every female body.
Classics

With all of the new stuff that comes in every season, there are certain things that never really go out of fashion.  If you get one of these, make it a classic cut, a classic color, and get  good quality, so you can wear it for years to come.
Trench coats and peacoats are back.  Well, they would be, if they had ever left.  Verdict:  If you don't have a classic trench coat (short or long), get one.  Trust me.  There's reason these weather proof coats have been popular since before Humphrey Bogart.  The peacoat is a golden winter standard for a reason, but is a bit more personal taste driven.  In either case, stay classic and shy away from overly trendy patterns, colors, and textures. (Put down that day glo plaid peacoat.)
Tweed is back, too, for jackets, except it never left either. Verdict: if you like tweed, get it.  Again, stay away from overly trendy colors and shapes, and opt for a classic.
Blazers never left the room.  The style availability  has expanded (shrunken, fitted, boyfriend) and for the first time in quite a  while, they come in any color you could want.  They're another easy way to class up an outfit and make it look like you give a damn, even if you don't.  Verdict: Don't go overly trendy, and get quality.

Rock Chick Blues and Layout Changes

1) "Turquoise" and silver earrings, gift,
2) Cornflower blue pendant, $6, Kohl's
3) Blue cardigan, $11, Express
4) Graphic abstract tee (under cardigan), $5, Target via Goodwill
5) Silky polka dot print belt, $0.50, Goodwill
6) Jeans, $20, Old Navy
7) 60 eye Doc Martens, $180, Zappos

You may've noticed that my format has changed, both in terms of layout and clothing lists.  In both cases, this is a way to make things easier on my readers. 
The layout seems much more readable and allows for a better display, as well as allowing readers to quickly scroll through if they're hunting for one outfit in particular.  Please notify me of any glitches or sizing/ legibility/ loading issues so I can fix them (if I can.)
The new links in the clothing lists are links to similar (in certain cases, the exact) items to what is listed.  Since most of what I wear is from the thrift store or clearance rack, it would be very difficult to downright impossible to find the exact item, hence the similar items.  There will be cases where I can't find anything like an item on the current market, like the belt above.  If that is the case, I'll leave it unlinked.  I'm also partially relying on y'all to let me know when these links go dead or to a bad redirect, so I can either remove the link or update it.
You may also have noticed that there's an extra zero on the price of my boots.  That's not a typo, I actually paid full price for these.  I bought them to wear at my wedding reception and have been wearing them out ever since.  For ladies looking to buy a pair, be forewarned: the 60 eyes are sized in men's sizes, not women's.
The sweater actually came with these god awful, gaudy rhinestone buttons that refused to stay buttoned.  After arguing with them through 3 or for wearings, I decided to fix that.  I took some el cheapo white buttons and colored them with nail polish.  It actually worked, and I sewed on the resulting blue buttons after cutting off the useless buttons.

Patterns and Prints: Fall/ Winter 2012

Patterns appear to have taken a backseat to texture this year.  Both are still fairly prevalent, but it would appear that in an effort to winterize the trends, the fashion gods have decreed that texture reigns.

What few patterns exist are generally loud and aggressive.  Nineteen seventies psychedelics, bold geometrics, and color blocking are all over the place.  Some are keepers, some won’t last a month, and some a flash in the pans that can be made keepers, if you’re careful.

 I’d heavily recommend skipping on by the psychedelics.  It looks to be a 3 week flash in the pan.  Besides, you really don’t want to look like a hippie’s bad acid trip.  That said, if you like the psychedelics, keep it minimal.  A psychedelic purse, a trippy belt.  For the love of god, don’t go head to toe in this trend.  Verdict: Skip this.  It’s a flash in the pan and doesn’t look good on much of anyone.

The geometrics, if done right, can be friendly.  Think Navajo prints, batik dyes, plaids, and argyles. Positioned or scaled correctly, they can draw attention to a tiny waist or away from hips of which you aren’t particularly proud. Positioned and scaled wrong, suddenly even Barbie thin legs look like tree stumps.  The general rule of thumb is that the size of the print should match your fame size.  Tiny frame?  You generally don’t want the huge floral print.  Built like a linebacker?  You might want to skip the swiss dots.  These rules aren’t hard and fast, though.  There’s going to be the occasional article of clothing that breaks all the fashion rules and looks damn hot on you doing it. Verdict:  A traditional sized plaid, check, or polka dot would look good on most women, although beware the lumberjack and schoolgirl effects with plaids.  With the native and exotic styled prints, I recommend using them more as accents than the entire outfit.  It’s too easy to go overboard and look like caricature of the culture than pay homage to it.

Color blocking does wonders for the female figure.  It truly can enhance or create an hourglass shape like no one’s business.   Darker colors will cause the eye to flow away from the area; lighter colors will draw the eye.  Knowing that little bit of magic right there will help you make colorblocking work for you.  Too lazy/ cheap to go buy new clothes, like me?  Congratulations, wearing a shirt that’s a different color from your bottom is color blocking.  Add a different colored belt if you’re really pushing the envelope that day.  Verdict: Go for it.  As long as you watch where the blocks land and what color ends up where, this is a great trend.  It’s been around several years and will probably be around several years more.

Color Me Trendy: Fall/ Winter 2012

If you're here, you're at least vaguely aware of what passes for a trend each season, if only for laughing material. Some of y'all, I know are die hard fashion fiends; others really don't care so long as it's clean and not falling off.  For my fashion fiends trying to meet a budget, this is the first in a seasonal series of what's on trend and worth buying.  I'll run through the colors, cuts, and trends that seem to be most prevalent and see which ones hold water. If you don't agree with what I have to say about a trend, do what's right for you. I'm not the fashion goddess.
As per usual, darker colors are in and lighter/ pastels are out, as decreed by the fashion gods.  It appears that the two big colors are wine and gold. 
Wine, burgundy, dark red, whatever you call it, can come in  a shade to fit almost any complexion. Almost.  Those with very fair skin, red hair, or that are prone to sunburning may have trouble finding a wine color that works.  If you can't find one, don't worry about it.  Carry a glass of red, you'll be fine.  (Unless you're in public.  Then the cops might have something to say.)  This color red is neutral enough that even if the hot color is something different in 3 weeks, you won't stand out like a sore thumb for wearing it.  Verdict:  If you can find a shade that looks good on you and the article itself looks good on you and is well made, go for it.
Gold also appears to be another color of the moment. Not just golden accessories, either.  I've seen hints that 1980s gold lame' may make a comeback. I'm one of those people that firmly believes some people look good in gold, some people don't. I look better in silver.  If you feel/ look better in silver, feel free to ignore this.  If gold is your thing, I'd say stock up, since it's popular and gold jewelry rarely goes out of style.  That said, I'm referring to jewelry here.  Anything in gold lame' should get an automatic veto.  Do you really wanna look like Peggy Bundy? (You do?  Well, this is your season.)  Be careful with golden accents.  Golden pinstripes or hints are one thing, a shirt that half metallic gold fiber is quite another.  You want the gold as an accent, not the showpiece, or you run the risk of fashion victim.  Verdict: Tread this line carefully.  If you're unsure, put it back.  The gold metallic trend is likely to be a flash in the pan for the winter, and even if its not, you still run the risk of looking like an 80's reject.
It looks like the fashion gods have decreed black and white/ black and navy to be the OMGFASHYUN color combos this winter.  Again.  Each winter, they declare black and white as the fashion palette, with a side of black and another neutral.  I know some of y'all out there are screaming in rage because you can't wear white (doesn't look good, guaranteed spills), or can't wear black (white pet, doesn't look good.)  If you can't pull off the stark summer whites due to it washing you out, try the softer winter whites or a creamier color.  If black washes you out worse than a spotlight, try navy or another very dark color.  If it still doesn't work, meh, no worries, it's only clothing trends; wear what you want.  Black and navy has always struck me as being very hard to pull off. One misstep and it looks like you got dressed in the dark.  I'm sure the trendy folk are yelling at me about how it's supposed to look that way, but I live in the real world.  I'd say unless you can easily differentiate between the black and navy in low light, don't mix 'em.  It's just too easy to go into fashion victim territory with that.  Verdict: If they look good on you, black and white are a safe color mix, it comes around as a trend every year.  You'll get plenty of wear out of it.  Black and navy has been a trend for the past several winter so, if you can pull it off, this look is likely here to stay for a while as well.  Go for both.